Upper Decker Here I Come!!!!!

The silver lining to my crash is all the spare time I have to translate scrolls and huff jenkem. In my enlightened state I have come to focus most of my energy on one thing: The Upper Decker. For those of us who only look at the pictures when reading:




this will result in this:
As you may know I have vowed to perform and upper decker before the year is out. I am very excited about this for obvious reasons, the most important one being that it is fucking hilarious. I am still up in the air as to location. This is a key decision. As I have mentioned previously, I would prefer to target an individual as opposed to a random public place, but this will be difficult. Someone you would like to upper deck isn't  necessarily going to have you over for tea and crumpets. I will remain vigilant, an opportunity shall arise and I will be there to act. Hopefully I have my camera so as to provide excellent photographic evidence such as the pictures above. I do believe these photos to be from two separate upper deckings, which for some reason makes it even funnier. I doubt the victim views it this way, but the perpetrator actually has done them a favor, providing them with their own perpetual jenkem hotbox. One man's shit is another man's gold.

In other news, the illustrious C"rot"ch Ryback has been spotted at the new Roman style bath house in Jefferson City, MO. My sources confirm that he arrived in a limo with Criss Angel and a team from RedWheel Cycles, a local Jeff City Bike shop. They entered the bath house many days ago and have not been seen since, although several lotion delivery trucks have come and gone. No pun intended. I fear that our C"rot"ch is being mannippleated (again, no pun intended) by Criss Angel who likely found Crotch in the midst of a jenkem trance and took advantage of his inebriated state. If you live in the Missouri area and have some spare time, please swing by the bath house and tell Croatch that we are in desperate need of a duty report. It is only fair to warn who ever accepts this mission that you will be entering an environment of extreme danger and naked men. You might want to double up on the underpants.

Thanks and Get Totally Fucked (but not by Criss Angel)
Doctor